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Giggles has been helping me a lot with chores lately. When I take out the trash, he helpfully bites the bag. When I change the litter, he helpfully stands in the litterbox. I think I'll change his official job title to Chief Operations Officer Giggles.

it makes me go instantly insane seeing the Dawn advert where it's someone cleaning oil spill-stricken ducks with it

When a chimpanzee or other ape "smiles" 9 out of 10 times they're actually showing their teeth as a threat. But capuchins can smile like a human... they do little happy grins... My heart can't take this. The information is too much for me

https://t.co/10chqx2mlV https://t.co/BaagvaWjFZ

Sent this to the family groupchat and they completely ignored it https://t.co/U3WdaWQike

my sleepy ass could never work at a mattress store

Our podcast is back after being on break plz follow the twitter and spotify to see when the episode comes out (this weekend) https://t.co/Vd6erkSlIF https://t.co/XMweaca34n

I'm a short-termist. I believe in doing all the same stuff the longtermists want, but without the elaborate rationalizations. Plz give me drugs

Is there a term for pretending a certain policy/ideology controls things when they don't, and then declaring the failure of that policy/ideology? If there isn't, we need a term for it, because it's nonstop (defunding police resulted in crime! Socialists ruined SF! Etc.)

I made a game on stream where every time there's a whipcrack in Johnny Test, I took a drink. The episode was only 11 minutes. I drank 230 times. https://t.co/mutj3szqVt

@kaliiibratiiion that was God's idea

@mrjaydeeem @etdweasel This was mine! I imported it about 10 years ago. https://t.co/NvtLBMrxic

I want to see what is cooking up Automattic?

https://t.co/8r7wwReXmh

this is the funniest video ive ever seen https://t.co/wKxnIayz9o

Are you ready #teamAMR? It’s race day. #AstonMartin #8HBahrain #DuelInTheDesert https://t.co/E41tJeZpA3

https://t.co/ZVoNYzaw26

Head to head. One more time. The #8HBahrain is next. #AstonMartin #DuelInTheDesert https://t.co/bq1GovGReb

When I thanked @readywriting for this humane and searing work she said, "I’m hoping that this piece will help someone feel less alone." I think it will make everyone who reads it feel less alone. https://t.co/7jQtAri0ks

City people 🤝 country folk ignoring the strange noises outside at night

i wanted to see her when i was ten. i finally saw Avril live tonight. https://t.co/lZUMCGpNAF

RUR - Eric Baldwin https://t.co/6yWf767oRk

We donate every year. @wikipedia and @internetarchive are lights leading forward from the internet's original promise--free exchange of information, free global participation https://t.co/pVBZkvuWFf

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Some examples of the real estate just outside of turn 4 @Interlagos. Life goes on and in Brazil the disparity is always in plain sight. However, in the 29 years I've been coming here, I've noticed a slight improvement. So that's progress I guess #f1 https://t.co/zl8uSwXoqs

also I dont know why these people always act like starbucks workers are ultra leftists when a large portion of the people ive worked with at starbucks have been the worst conservatives ive ever met

Toyota has unveiled its new Rally2 concept car at #RallyJapan ⬇️ https://t.co/TOPKJwXQYq

@NeoYokel @viticci I love how the “memo” button in the shortcuts bar perfectly aligns with the “send message” bar in Messages when in slide-over.